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Celebrating Valentine’s Day After the Death of a Spouse

Celebrating Valentine’s Day After the Death of a Spouse

Grief is a natural response to how we feel when we lose someone who meant so much to us. Sadness comes in many different ways. 


Where there was a spot in your heart full of love and happiness, there is now sadness, loneliness, and wonder. Special days often bring up the strongest emotions. Whether it is your first Valentine’s Day alone after the death of a spouse, or tenth, there are appropriate ways to celebrate and remember your loved one.


Celebrating Valentine’s Day After The Death Of A Spouse


During any holiday, your memories and feelings will return – and will often come back strong. Some memories and feelings are sweet; some are confusing and painful. Everyone grieves on their own time. It may take weeks or years for people to cope.


Understand that Valentine’s Day is especially hard because you are reminded of the love you had. Honor your beloved. Take some time to cherish what you had. Remember the impact they made on your life. Celebrate their life this Valentine’s Day.


Activities To Try


Remember your loved one this Valentine’s Day. Also, take some time for yourself and take some time to heal. Not sure what to do or where to start? There are ways to make the most of Valentine’s Day.


Find grief-activities that are appropriate for where you are at . Reach out to people who will support you during this time. 


Activities to consider:


Journal: Journaling can be a great way to cope with the past. You can write all of your thoughts down to help settle your various thoughts. Haven’t journaled before? Journaling is easy to start and can be done at your own convenience.


Be you: Chances are you may want to continue this day like any other day. This response is completely acceptable. Stay indoors with a puzzle, a book, family, or friends. Go for a light run to stay active. 


Scrapbook: Scrapbooks can be used to visually remember the memories you created together. This plan is great  for those who wish to stay indoors and stay busy.


Reflect: Create a time capsule to bury. You can dig it up in ten, fifteen, or thirty years. Curious about the healing you’ve done? Time capsules can provide a sense of closure. You can see how you’ve grown in a set time frame.


Try to think of what senses need encouragement. What does this mean? Redirect your tougher emotions into something more enlightening. 


Do you feel like screaming? Try to sing a song that means something to you and your partner. Feel like crying? Enjoy old pictures you took on your favorite adventure together. These are some healthy ways to cope. 


I Would Like More Support


Bakken-Young is here for you. If you need ideas for support groups or someone to talk to, turn to your trusted Bakken-Young family for help. You are not alone this Valentine’s Day.


Have questions or need support? Call us at (715) 425-8788.

Living, loving, remembering. 


  • Kui Posted February 13, 2021 3:34 pm

    Hello I have a question .my boyfriend whom I loved very much passed on 2019 ..yes . Time has passed I have a moved on buh in a way this will be second valentine’s without him .that emptiness I’s still comes up all of a sudden again .I will try and take it easy on my self .Is it normal feeling sad on the 2nd year even though you moved on ?

    • Erin Posted February 14, 2022 8:14 am

      KUI, I’m Not an expert and my grief journey has just started, as February 14, 2022 marks the one month anniversary of my husband‘s passing. We were married for 17 1/2 years and knew each other almost 20 years. Just pulling from what I’ve read and how I’ve talked to some widows from my church, it’s very normal to still have sadness overcome you the second year and even for years to come. The heart loves deeply and this isn’t something that it can let go of easily. I’m sorry for your loss and hope you can find love again.

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