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When You’re Tired of the Cold and the Grief
By the time late winter arrives in our part of Wisconsin, many people are simply tired—tired of the cold, tired of the gray skies, tired of waiting for spring. For those who are grieving, this weariness can run even deeper. The long season may begin to feel like a mirror of the grief journey itself: heavy, slow, and harder to endure than you expected.
If you find yourself thinking, “I’m just so tired of feeling like this,” you are not alone. Late winter grief is a very real experience, and it makes sense that both your body and heart might feel worn out.
Why Late Winter Can Feel Especially Heavy
Earlier in the season, there may have been holidays, gatherings, or a sense of “getting through” the first rounds of milestones without your loved one. By late February, those events are past, but your loss is still present. The world may seem ready to move on long before you feel ready yourself.
You might notice:
- A dip in energy or motivation
- Feeling more discouraged or flat than before
- A sense that support from others has quieted down
- Impatience with your own grief—“Shouldn’t I be further along?”
These are understandable reactions when grief and a long winter meet.
Giving Yourself Permission to Be Where You Are
It can be easy to judge yourself for feeling stuck or tired. But grief is not a straight line, and there is no schedule you have to keep. Late winter can be a time to gently reset your expectations and give yourself permission to:
- Move more slowly
- Say no to extra commitments
- Rest when you’re exhausted—emotionally or physically
- Acknowledge, “This is a hard time of year for me.”
Sometimes, just admitting that this season is difficult can take a bit of the pressure off.
Small Steps That Can Help
You don’t have to make big changes to support yourself in late winter. Often, small, consistent actions can create a sense of steadiness while you wait for brighter days.
Here are a few ideas:
- Seek light where you can.
Open curtains during the day, sit by a window, or step outside briefly when the sun appears. Even short moments of natural light can make a difference. - Add gentle movement.
A slow walk, light stretching, or simply standing outside for a few breaths can help your body release some tension. You don’t need a formal exercise plan—just small, kind movements. - Plan one thing to look forward to.
This could be a visit with a friend, a favorite meal, a drive to a familiar place, or a quiet afternoon with a book. Having something simple on the calendar can give you a small point of hope. - Revisit or create a memory ritual.
As the season shifts, you might choose to light a candle in the evening, tend to a plant, or begin a journal where you write one memory or thought about your loved one each week.
Reaching Out When Energy Is Low
When you feel worn out, reaching out can feel like one more task. But connection, even in small doses, can be very grounding.
Consider:
- Sending a short message to someone you trust: “This time of year is hard for me.”
- Accepting an invitation that feels manageable, even if it’s brief.
- Letting a family member know you’re having a tougher week.
You don’t have to share everything; you simply don’t have to carry everything alone.
Looking Toward Spring—Without Rushing Yourself
As late winter slowly gives way to early signs of spring, you may feel a mix of emotions: relief at the changing season, sadness that time is moving further from the day of your loss, or uncertainty about what comes next.
There is no need to rush yourself into feeling hopeful or “better” just because the weather is warming. Instead, you might gently notice small signs of change—a patch of grass, birds returning, more light in the evenings—and let them be quiet reminders that even in hard seasons, some things do slowly shift.
You Deserve Support in Every Season
Grief does not end when the holidays do, and it does not disappear when the snow melts. It is okay if you still need support, understanding, and space to grieve in late winter and beyond.
At Bakken-Young, we are here for you in every season—whether you are newly bereaved or carrying a loss that has been with you for many years. If the weight of this time of year feels like too much, please know that reaching out for help is a sign of wisdom and strength, not weakness.
You don’t have to get through late winter grief on your own. We are here to walk with you.
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